...When I learn to Simply LIVE with LOVE.
Some of my recent thoughts, a little all over the place but I wanted to share. I keep getting these wonderful revelations of God's Love, I pray that you too would experience this daily!
I think perhaps the biggest lie I ever believed was when I was making the decision to re-dedicate my life back to the Lord in 2008 was this, “Christianity is boring”. I almost fall over laughing at this now as I reminisce over the last 4 years, my journey has certainly been a lot of things, some things good, some things bad but boring, not even close! I have experienced joy so abundantly that can only be described as little moments of Heaven on earth and pain so deep that I thought I would die before my next breath. I have lived in happiness, love, faith, hope, kindness, blessing as well as oppression, depression, unbelief, suffering and heartache. I have felt the presence of God as a consuming fire and I have felt the deceiving fire’s of hell. I have overcome obstacles in my faith that are only understood by the Lord. I have been rejected, insulted, cut down, betrayed, sick, hungry, tired, deceived, hated, lonely, depressed, angry, frustrated, mistaken, misunderstood, lost, confused, and completely broken multiple times. More than all of that, I have been LOVED by God and by His people and because I know this LOVE of the Father I can press on. I can forgive others for the hurt because I have been forgiven and saved by the grace of the Lord paid for by the blood of Jesus. It is because of this Love that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me as I enter into a time in my faith of knowing good and evil while continually learning to live relying on the Word of God.
I look forward now to a future time when I can yet again be sent out to the nations for the Gospel’s sake, but for now I wait patiently on the Lord’s timing. In my spirit I am ready, my heart aches for the nations, I am beginning to hope again to spread the love of Jesus to the nations for the first time in over a year. I went through some great hardships and was stripped bare. Each day I now grow in the ways of the Lord, each day I know Jesus a little more, I still make mistakes but this is how I grow. As difficult as some parts of living for the Lord are, the thought of not living a life with God seems utterly horrid, something I am not willing to risk.
So I yet again stand at a crossroad, do I leave this season in the wilderness and risk everything? Or am I going to continue wondering through the desert trying to gain back what I’ve already given up? The choice is difficult, the right answer is clear, yet I find myself more human and more afraid than ever before. I have come to see that anyone who has done anything really great has indeed taken a great risk not knowing the outcome. So I sit and wait, and the more I sit and wait the more I begin to realize that perhaps I am not waiting on the Lord, but He is waiting on me to take the risk, to trust Him wholly and fully with every single part of my life, no matter how messed up I am and how many things I think need fixing in my character. I continue to make small compromises that take away from my faith. I continue to have a back -up plan, “just in case” God doesn’t show up. Even writing that, I feel truly and utterly convicted. I live in society where we have to “line up all our ducks in a row” before we are willing to try anything worthy to be significant, that we must be secure, comfortable, reliant upon our resources before we can leap for God. For some reason I keep trying to find that in the Bible, even though I know it isn’t there. In the word of God, I don’t see “make sure you are all taken care of and then come and follow me”. Actually what I see is this:
Matthew 4:19 NIV
“"Come, follow me," Jesus said, "and I will make you fishers of men."
Matthew 6:19-21 NIV
19“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
Matthew 6:25-34
25“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"
28“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (emphasis added)
So I stand staring at the sands in my wilderness, inching one step at a time towards a greater faith in the Lord my God. Each day God continues to prove His faithfulness to me. My human strength dwindles low, God’s spirit empowers me to carry out simple daily tasks and to love each individual person that God brings into my path. I am thankful that no matter where I am God teaches me to live simply in the moment enjoying relationship with the Lord and loving people no matter their culture, their story or their beliefs. The truth really is that all the gifts of the spirit that God gives us are powerless without the love of God behind them.
This lesson of LOVE is the most valuable I am learning and will continue to learn throughout this journey towards eternity with Jesus.
1 Corinthians 1:1-3 NIV
1If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Thank You Lord for loving me and saving me from an eternity of separation from you through Jesus Christ. Thank You for the daily empowerment by your spirit, given to me as a gift of your grace.
Amen
No comments:
Post a Comment